Beck Shows His Stripes

Although a tiger never changes his stripes, he may be able to cover them, possibly from the mounds of muck he has raked up over the years. In fact, some might even mistake a tiger for a completely different animal, and shower it with praise. Such an animal is Glenn Beck. This former morning zoo reject turned Mormon and conservative talk sweetheart/poster-boy admitted in an interview that appeared in Forbes magazine that, "I could give a flying crap about the political process...we're an entertainment company." I doubt that many of his die-hard followers would read such a hoity-toity elitist rag like Forbes, and would notice this. All the hateful ideological drivel he spouts is nothing more than a method for raking in substantial amounts of cash, the smallest fraction of which (a modest $2 million a year) from his popular 'entertainment' show, on which he constantly sheds tears and uses some of the most amazingly backwards, circular logic to make his famous (and famously parodied (2)) assumptions and connections. At first I wasn't able to figure out why people adore Beck so much, but it finally came to me. He's the Larry the Cable Guy of punditry. A pudgy, white, average-looking guy who wears a persona and a button-up shirt. Like a buttoned up shirt. He's not business-like as Hannity prefers to appear, or a cranky old fart like O'Reilly. He's the pale, religious guy that cries a lot, loves his country, and is just like you, but just happened to make 32 million dollars last year.
Good job turning all that fear-mongering into cold, hard cash, Beck.